Sunday, October 30, 2005

ignore this if youre only interested in knitting

So i dont know where this post is headed. I cant decide if im up or down. Stupid fall. I started a new job, that I love so far. Im tired and end up staying late alot. but things are good with it so far. Its kept me too busy to get much knitting done though. Which blows, since ive got so many projects started and promised. In over my head a little bit with it.
And this weekend has sucked pretty hard too. Gettign my first check earlier in the week, and having a nice few hours with my mom yesterday has been the only good part about the whole thing. The rest has been at least slightly tainted. Completely out of my mind from being tired and pmsing hasnt made anything easier on me. hasnt made anything easier on the guy i thought was my boyfriend either. btu apparently he doesnt know what he wants, and doesnt know what we are and a bunch of bs that im still not sure what i think about, except that it pisses me off and hurts my feelings, but are probably not in that order of importance. because, wouldnt you begin to assume, even with out a direct convo about it, that if you know each others families, neither of you is interested in anyone else, you spend 90% of your freetime together, sleep together most of the time too, and have discussions about where our christmases and thanksgivings are gonna be at (ths year) that youre nost just 'seeing' each other, but have crossed over into the actual relationship territory? Cuz um. if not, then my bad. Oh, and i didnt bring it up. He did. apparently some chick i havent ever heard of wanted him to take her out and he didnt know what to tell her, since we hadnt talked about it in specific terms. but um, when i told him how one of my friends that was interested in me at the same time we met got pissy at me beacuse he realised i was seeing someone, he was all, youre nto gonna go out with him right?? so WTF. seriously. If i didnt like him so much and wasnt totaly worried about either overwhelming him or alowing him to think i dont care enough id have done something already. but i cant even manage to bring it up again yet. because i dont know how i feel about it for sure or what i want to do about it. except that i dont even a little bit, think i could handle him seeing someone else.

2 Comments:

Blogger Heather said...

ho
just checking to see how you are doing. i still havent finished the bear you sent, hoping for valentines day.

12:46 AM  
Blogger Miranda said...

I'm doing great, just soooooo busy is all. I haven't really had time to sit and write anything...

1:45 PM  

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